The Enneagram Type 9 is commonly labeled “The Peacemaker” for their easy-going, friendly nature. They’re always seeking harmony in their immediate environment, meaning they will avoid conflict at all costs.
Someone who is a Type 9 may not always be aware of their own opinions or desires. They’re so focused on keeping peace and harmony in their environment that they forget to pay attention to their deep-seated needs.
Below you will find an overview of what motivates the Enneagram Type 9 and things they can work on to improve their daily living.
Enneagram Type 9’s Focus of Attention
On Others
Nines are others-focused. They would much rather go with the flow or do what others want (even if they don’t always agree) to maintain a sense of peace and harmony.
Nines do this to avoid their worst fear – conflict. They tend to be self-forgetting and not in tune with their own needs or emotions – especially anger.
Being Diplomatic
Nines are good at seeing all sides of an issue, mainly because they don’t know what their own opinion is.
They can see value in both sides of a debate, but if you ask them what they think, they will often skirt the question, so they don’t have to give an opinion.
They don’t want to pick a side for fear that they will upset the opposition, potentially leading to conflict.
Avoiding Conflict
A Type Nine’s worst fear is being in conflict with someone else. Why? They subconsciously think that conflict will lead to separation, especially with important others in their life.
Nines have difficulty saying “no” when someone asks them to do something, even if the Nine doesn’t want to do it. They may act out passive-aggressively to avoid doing what they don’t want.
Type 9’s Passion: Sloth
The Enneagram Type 9’s passion is Sloth.
Sloth, in this case, refers to laziness in oneself. It doesn’t mean that Nines are physically lazy (though they can sometimes be known to veg out in front of the TV instead of being productive – but who doesn’t?).
Nines tend not to pay attention to their own needs or desires because they’re so focused on those around them.
Nines can have weak boundaries because they’re more likely to say “yes” when someone asks them to do something, even if they want to say “no.”
Sloth can also show up in the form of staying comfortable and sticking to routines the Nine is already familiar with instead of trying new things.
A Nine might ask themselves, “Why rock the boat when something is working?”
But the Nine may not realize that this go-with-the-flow attitude is holding them back from experiencing all the things life has to offer.
Type 9’s Strengths and Struggles
Strengths
Struggles
- Easy-going
- Adaptive
- Supportive
- Good mediators
- Friendly
- Helpful
- Being aware of their anger
- Taking a path of least resistance
- Going along with others' decisions to create harmony and avoid conflict
- Their anger can come out as passive-aggressive behavior
Things for Enneagram Type 9 to Work On
> Try to voice your opinions more often. Start with something as small as picking what to have for dinner and work your way up to harder decisions.
> Notice when you are numbing out (e.g. watching TV, scrolling through Instagram, reading) to avoid being in the world. What is the reason you are choosing to narcotize instead of being present?
> Repeat this mantra daily: “My presence matters.”
If Someone You Love is a Type 9
If you have a Type Nine in your life, it might be good to ask them what they want every once in a while.
They might say “I don’t mind. Whatever you want to do is fine.” But encourage them to think about what it is they want (or maybe even ask what they don’twant) to help with their indecisiveness.
Even something as simple as picking which restaurant you go to for dinner can be a huge win for a Nine.
Encourage these small decisions to help the Nine break out of their indecisive shell.
"You cannot find peace by avoiding life."
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